The loneliness that nobody notices now...

And so I told myself,

For if we cannot be together we will be apart.
But if we cannot be apart we will be together. 

And so I convinced myself. To leave.
To run.
To feel the sun.
And sit inside.
Because I can't hide.

Hoping you will know.
It was only then that I could stand the twirls and tears. 
When the pond sang to me, this is a painting that will fade away.
The colors bleed and mesh.


Because I do, I do, I want to, I do.

I love you without knowing how,
or when,
or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride.

And this will never change.
But not love. In love. 
I pray. 
Head down palms to chest. 
Dear heaven help me rest.

What is this thing
This love
That keeps me glued to the stars on the ceiling
Wondering
If she's looking back.

Begging slow.
I wanted to stay.
I wanted to play.


I won't tell you what to be.
It used to be you and me.
But I promise my love will always be free.

Smile next to me.